I want to be a writer. A professional writer. To write a lot. Write novels, write articles for online and print magazines, and write all the stories I have lived with since I was born.
My original affection for writing started from my primary school days. I read too many books as I wasn't allowed to have the play-filled childhood most children have. Then naturally I began to have my own stories. I would read a novel, feel unhappy about how the story ends, and then rewrite it in my head. I would make stories from happenings at school, mostly about getting back at my bullies and a couple about winning some particular hearts. I loved poems. I liked the way they say a lot without saying much. The depth they squeeze into shallow words. I loved to read and write poems that rhyme. So I did most of my early writings in rhyming poems. I would occasionally write conventional articles (prose) for competition. And when I started reading more philosophical books I began writing more prose.
Now the bulk of my affection for writing is that all my heroes except one were professional writers. Samuel Langhorne Clemens (Mark Twain), Oscar Wilde and George Bernard Shaw were all life long writers. Steve Jobs was the non-writer. Writing brings me closer to their type of heroism, the type I admire. To put it more plainly, writing helps me become more like my heroes. And the type of writing they did wasn't the teaching type, the raise no sands type, the let lying dogs lie type nor the there-is-a-line-to-not-cross type. And that is what makes me specially admire them. The ability to turn your inside out in words.
And that is what I really want to be in life.
You'll notice that I didn't mention anything about being a great father with a wonderful family, changing the world, making the world a better place and achieving greatness. I strongly believe that if you are true to yourself and not subject yourself to unnatural theories about how things should be, you would achieve all those. The moment I started ignoring the theory that the more vital information I hold back the more valuable I would become, I stopped suppressing my natural desire to share what I know. And I have seen my value rise because of that, though not instantaneously. I now regularly get emails from people thanking me for freely sharing my knowledge. By being honest and straightforward, I have healthy relationships with people. People trust me and I trust them back. Even the few who abuse my honesty and trust have had little effect on me. I hold no grudges, I move on and I keep being me. I always go about with my own sunshine. I have little expectations from others and allow them plenty room for mistakes. And that's the real me. And I am sure that everyone, though differently wired, are good people naturally. And if you figure out the real you and let it shine forth, you will make the world a better place and have a wonderful family.