The Number One Cause of Frustration: Expectations
posted by Michael Olafusi , on ,
When will the results of the job interview be out? or have some people been contacted?
What does she think about me?
When is he going to pay back the money he borrowed from me?
Why is Junior not as smart as my neighbour's children?
When is he going to ask me out or at least open up about his feelings, rather than telling friends?
When am I going to become rich? (My favourite)
What am I going to write about? (My daily worry)
Why? Why? Why? This is not fair! (Some people's favourite)
Every week, I experience frustration. And this past week was loaded with it. A writer's block fell on me and almost crushed me. My blog stats are not helping either. It's like driving round a roundabout; you are covering distance but getting no where. Clients aren't responding to my mails. Everybody is back to Lagos and resumed work; the traffic is back too. I couldn't find the blazer I wanted, even after roaming the entire Lekki and VI till 8:30pm. I'm spending more time online reading about other people's frustration, looking for virtual companionship. And now, I'm writing about frustration.
I can link all my frustrations to one simple cause: Expectation. But I can't come up with any way to avoid it. It's part of life. I think it's a symptom of being alive. The more alive you are, the more frustration you'll experience. Because every worthwhile activity you engage in creates an expectation in you.
You go for a job interview, and boom, you begin to expect a feedback.
You are in love with a charming person, and voila, you expect the charming person to love you back.
You have lots of ideas, and you are expecting them to turn into money.
You are doing your best, and the only thing you want is for everything to be perfect. You feel it should happen because you've worked for it.
Well, I can tell you one thing for sure: Before whatever you expect happens, you'll have to get along with Mr Frustration. Frustration is what happens when reality and expectations are not meeting. And for most regular people, like me, they seldom meet.
But I won't leave you feeling helpless. I want you to know that every time you are frustrated, it is because you are alive and active. And you need to find a way to get along more peaceably with Mr Frustration. I find reading about other frustrated people very comforting. I also find screaming once in a while extremely comforting. And I find drowning my thoughts in work most comforting.